On Violence and Idiocy

Dear Morons,

If you think this is an impolite way of talking to you, then you probably deserve it. The people who I do not deem as moronic, know they have not committed any huge acts of idiocy to earn the title, and are therefor not offended.

So, if you are asking, "Why am I a moron, and how can I fix this?" I commend you. You are probably not, because if you are aware of how idiotic you are, then you probably aren't anymore.

I'm talking to you, Senator Leeland Yee, Ralph Nader, the NRA and all the others who are proclaiming ""We are in the peak of [violence in entertainment]. Television program violence? Unbelievable. Video game violence? Unprecedented,"

I've got a story to tell you gents. So listen up.

I play games. I am a gamer.

Last night, I played a little Borderlands 2 with some friends,
We had a blast, we caught up on our daily lives, hadn't talked in a while due to work, and this was our time to relax and chill. My friends live nearly an hour or so away, so not really feasible for me to see them after work a lot. So we play games together. it gives us something to do that isn't just chatter via an IM window. It has excitement and story. We had a grand time of it. All digital, a little stress relief at the end of a long day.

Let me tell you what we didn't do.

We didn't go out and beat or kill anyone.
We didn't go out on a rampage or killing spree.
We didn't go out and buy tons of guns and ammo because the games told us to.

We're not stupid, we're adults. Adults who have been playing games for most of our lives.
You criticize and find "links" in violence cases like grasping at straws to link things to your favorite scapegoat, mostly because you probably don't understand it and it bugs you that you can't control it.

We're in a peak of violence in entertainment?

Bitch please.

When was the last time a gamer purchased a whole caravan of slaves and forced them into gladiatorial combat against veterans and/or wild animals to get torn apart for the glory of the mob?

When was the last time a gamer donned his armor, and shoved a lance out to try and bash in the armor of a competing knight, or swung his mace and sword in a grand melee?

Or hey, what's the last major injury you saw from a wild night of gaming? I mean it's not like we toss a ball into a field, and then slam our skulls into each other, attempting to tackle and menace each other in the attempt to move said ball back and forth on a field. That would be football.


What we do, we do digitally, it doesn't harm anyone, countless, peer reviewed (That means fact checked for your moronic brain) studies have found no link between violence in game media and actual violence.

I'm a gamer, and I am not a violent person.

I'm not going to threaten or cajole, that would make this whole post hypocritical, and I am definitely not a hypocrite. That would be you, who say you serve the people. However I'm a gamer, and also a person, and one of your constituents, and you are definitely not doing me any service.

So I guess that makes you a potential for unemployment soon.

Maybe it will give you some free time to play a game or two.

Love and Kisses,
Me.

Some Helpful Desert Tips

“It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change.” - Charles Darwin

So I've been running around the big desert place now for a number of years, and through it I have, or my many friends, have picked up a number of helpful tips that it's about time we share with you. Some of them are obvious, the others perhaps a bit crazy seeming, but most of them are pretty good.

Re: Drinks
- Minimize the messy horror that coffee pots (or worse french press pots) and grounds can be, use a single cup drip, fold up the filter with the grounds to dry during the day and then toss it into a burn barrel at night. It smells nice. (From Rachel Clein-Cunningham )

- Don't bring bottles and bottles of stuff to drink, instead bring Two or three non-disposable water bottles for un-water drinks, and bring a powder concentrate in a single large re-usable jar, and add in to your water (Wendi Thompson)

Re: Gear
- Take a lesson from the Tuareg of the Sahara, light layers of absorbent clothing IS good. Not so heavy as to cause overheating, but good for keeping the sun off you and absorbing sweat, which when even a minor breeze comes up, helps cool you off. Combined with staying hydrated, this works REALLY well.

- A great combination for Dust Storms, day or night, is a pair of Welding Goggles and a Shemagh.
I recommend these as part of my personal gear.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0017Z04SK
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001ELUYZ0
The welding goggles have removable tinting (Or you can even get the ones you can flip the tinted part up and still have protective goggles on, and the scarf protects your skin, hair and face in those sudden bursts of aerial Sandpaper.

- Bring your own first aid kit! Just because there might be Medical help around to bandage you up, doesn't mean you should rely on the resource when you could have taken care of yourself. For something like this, you don't need all of the usual stuff. An acidic wound cleaner such as Hydrogen Peroxide, band aids of various sizes, bandages, medical tape, bandage shears, an ace wrap or two, antibiotic cream, aloe cream, sunscreen!

Also, remember your meds! In the scramble to pack and get ready, you can often forget that tiny bottle of what you need to keep your heart running, or remain breathing. Remember you might be at a different altitude than usual and if you have any sort of respiratory condition this can cause a normally mild condition to aggravate.

Re: Partying
- We know, we know, you are there to have fun. How fun is it to be laying on a backboard, smashed out of your brain and getting IV needles shoved in you because we picked your dusty carcass off deep desert, dehydrated beyond belief? Not very. Booze is NOT hydration. If you drink the booze, drink twice as much water. You should be drinking the amount of water mentioned in the survival guide.

- It's also not your party. It's everyone's party. Be mindful of your activities and remember when YOU are trying to sleep, whether you want that neighbor you annoyed by blasting Dub Step into their RV/Tent at 4am in the morning, they may decide to return the favor.

- Have fun. If you don't have fun you are doing it wrong. If you are doing it wrong, ask someone who is doing it right how not to do it wrong. Do not however push your feeling of wrong onto those who are doing it right. If you are miserable, either ask how not to be or shut up and keep it to yourself.


There are probably tons more, but I wanted to get a couple of these out there real fast. Feel free to add comments to other nifty "tricks" to your own betterment and survival out there to share with others and I'll update the post accordingly.

Pride

"From the equality of rights springs identity of our highest interests; you cannot subvert your neighbor's rights without striking a dangerous blow at your own." -Carl Schurz

So I do not... Often... Post political rants or discussions, mostly because I rarely get involved or feel passionately about them to feel moral about voicing my opinion.
However this one caught me, and has me questioning. Myself being a non-minority straight male, well... this may cause a shit storm, and the responses may make me think more on it, but here goes. (In many cases I use the word We, and by this word, I reference friends, anyone who might read this or WE as a SPECIES.)

So June... June is apparently Gay Pride Month.

Why?

I ask this based off an issue with this making it Special™.
Why do we feel the need to make a distinct Gay Pride Month or a black history month? Is there a Straight Pride Month? Is there a Conservative Evangelist Christian Values month? No, because those would be offensive.

I'm all for getting the word out, equality and acceptance, and a staunch defender of when I see bullying of any kind happening (Stopped some drunk fans on the late night train from picking on a gay couple last week in fact) but I think one of the larger issues is that this, it shakes the foundation of values people are used to. People don't like being shook up. Which is why they fight so hard for it. By declaring Gay Pride Month, could not the perception be "look at us, we are shiny and specialer than you are" to which people object.

Now an Equality Pride month I might understand more, where couples, gay, straight, etc. come out to show that hey, we are people, and we can co-exist together without eating babies in a post-apocalyptic explosion of cannibalistic voodoo rites or immediately launching into World Civil War 3 the Sequel.

By defining it as different, I think we give argument to those who would say "You are different, so we treat you different than we are.

Black History, Asian History, Gay Pride, I think they are all fantastic things to have, but by acknowledging division and difference do we not create the perception of difference?

So I bring the question. How can you show the world equality without slapping it in the metaphorical face with it?

Yes, we will never be able to convince everyone. Bigotry and hate will always exist. But let us then think or ponder...

How can we say without shouting, we are not different from one another, we are an equal and unique person. We will not hurt you, your institutions, or infringe on your rights, so do not do so on ours.

I wonder where this hostility has come from, could it be a reaction, not to the message, but how the message is presented? However I also consider the labels that we are all guilty of using. The Fat American, the Bad Asian, Female Driver, The Gangsta Black man, the lisping bright color wearing Gay man (See: Sassy Gay friend commercials, which I personally actually find hideously offensive in their attempt at humor), the Butch Lesbian or the Taco Bell Mexican.

By giving in to labels and stereotypes, we find ourselves falling into them all to often, our vitriol is often then reflected back. If you cannot accept others and their failings, then how can you ask and demand to be accepted as well? The next time you consider using one of these, stop yourself, and just accept a person for what they are. And think about yourself, what labels are you portraying. Do you embody any stereotypes? How can you remove that stigma from yourself to get people to see you as a person, but without changing who you are?

I am not advocating hiding away, or acting in secret, but I wonder if so much antagonistic and EXTREMELY public and aggressive tactics are really the way to go.

I also just wish that I could think of another way...

I declare this statement as truth. I am equal to every and all. No more or less than any person of this world. I am Straight, White, Male. I work in a normal job, and the only rights that entitles me to, are exactly the ones that every damn human being also earns. I am entitled to live my life how I want to live it as long as that does not interfere with the rights of others, and I believe in my soul, that no matter your preference, color, creed or thoughts, you are entitled to the same by the very concept on that YOU are human too. Let's find equality together.

Defeat

“A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.”
-Oscar Wilde

The reason I love the Doctor, is because even in the face of all things, he pities his enemies. He does not take pleasure in their downfall, but rather sorrow that things led to that state. Sorrow that he could not save them, at his own failures that led to their corruption and responsibility that another way could not be found towards redemption.

Today, a man, almost definitely an evil man, by the very actions he committed in whatever name or cause he followed, is dead. I see the jubilation, the profane cheering, the hand shaking of congratulatory masturbation.

And you know? I pity him, and the state of affairs that led to his death being necessity, but I take no pleasure in the knowledge of it. Mourn the people lost due to his actions, vilify him if you must, but accept that the cost of a life is almost always too high to pay.

But more than that, I pity ourselves. I feel the sorrow in what we have become. In the knowledge that we take enjoyment and pleasure from this, rather than relief and guilt in that things led down this path.

Maybe we couldn't have stopped affairs from leading to this further down the line, maybe sometimes tolerance, negotiation and faith aren't enough.

I am not deluded to think that we live in a perfect world where we can solve things ideally, but I cannot countenance or accept anything but sorrow at the end of this.

A man is dead, it was necessary. Accept that and learn from the history of our own mistakes. And strive never to need it to be the solution again.

2011

New Year's eve is like every other night; there is no pause in the march of the universe, no breathless moment of silence among created things that the passage of another twelve months may be noted; and yet no man has quite the same thoughts this evening that come with the coming of darkness on other nights. ~Hamilton Wright Mabie

Here we are, 2011.

It honestly feels like I was doing this just the other day. Perhaps it is the arbitrary number signifying progression of our years, but it leaves me feeling somewhat whimsical and contemplative about the whole thing. I'm going to share some of my thoughts in the usual rambling fashion that we've all become accustomed to.

This year has been a quixotic mix of the good and bad, which I am sure is your typical year for pretty much anyone and I've come to think about it and realized one thing.

Life isn't so bad.

Sure, some things could be better. We could all have jobs, stable homes and be with a person we love and are loved by, and etc. ad nauseum.

But really, look at what you do have.

If you are reading this, you have at least one friend and since I'm very particular about who I call a friend I can say with almost 100% certainty you are personable enough (Far more than me probably because after all you TOLERATE me) you most certainly have a lot more than that. Friends who care and are there for you in every way they can be (We all have our own lives to live after all) even if right at that moment they can't be. Have you taken the moment to thank them for that yet?

I shall do so now.

Thank you. For being my friend. For countless moments and hours spent listening to my ramblings, for tolerating my story telling habits, for the unending patience with my mood swings, and for veiling your annoyance with my pranks.

You are the very pillars that hold me high.

I have learned that love can come in different forms from all of you. That I am appreciated and loved by many of you, and I love you in return. I have learned that no matter how hard the hopes for something more with that certain someone(s) are broken, there will always be someone to catch me when I fall, even if that is Mr. Ground.

And really, none of us are really at rock bottom, as hard as it all is to believe sometimes.

You will find a job, it will come, and we can find ways to get you through those tight spots do until you do.
You will find a home, and as you lent me your couch when I was in need, you shall have mine in yours.
You will find love, often where you least expect it, but perhaps somewhere you do. And when it comes it will hit you in the stomach like a freight train, and we will sit back and laugh at the look on your face when you finally realize it with amusement. It may not happen this year, or the next, but giving up on it is for pansies. And I will totally smack you upside the head every time you talk about giving up. As I would expect you to do to me.
You will find happiness. Chances are you already have it, but as we are often blinded to our own because we compare it to that around us and often only see it as a pale comparison to that which we do not have (Really, when did happiness become a pissing contest?)We will Re-insert the smack across the head comment here. (I'm really not a violent person, I'm just good at it).

It's 2011, take your arbitrary number designation of a new year and run with it. Make not resolutions but actions and decisions, stand up and fight. Fight dirty. Figure out what you want and say "I WANT IT" and go and get it using every trick you can manage.
2010, I don't care if it was awesome or it sucked, but don't hope for more of the same, or stand as is. Hope and wishes, while good in small doses, are for poor sods that don't control their own lives. You aren't that and nobody really is, unless they decide not to step forward and take control of what they want from their life.

2011, you are so going going down as the year I kicked ass. If you try to get in my way, you are so totally screwed.

To all of you out there, I love you all. Happy New Year. To the best fracking year yet to come.

Thanks be oh, great ones!

For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food, for love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Yeah, it's been a while since I've done this. 'Ware the stickiness, because it's about to get sappy in here.

We are just past the day of the Great Turkey Massacre 2010 (except for all of you out there that butchered that poor defenseless Soy tofurkey... you monsters...).

I've seen a bunch of posts on what you are all thankful for.
Here's mine.
Sort of...

Having gone through the Great WTFBBQ that was 2009, I walked into 2010 with an open minded anticipation, hard won optimism and a bit of dread, would this be a repeat of last year? That nasty, stupid fat hobbitses of a year?
But, through the support of my friends, my quite formidable confidence in my own abilities (Yeah, totally not arrogant at ALL, am I?) I took the step forward.
Things did not immediately get better, but they most definitely didn't suck, no major illness or the usual host of injuries I somehow manage to sustain through the obstacle course of my life. Somehow the first few months manage to pass without incident. I remained confident that 2010 was going to be a better year.

Once again, July tried to prove me wrong.
In case you haven't followed the Book of James, July hates me. Apparently, somewhere in the past, I insulted July's mother, and now it wants to engage in fisticuffs with me each year, and when I attempt to avoid or otherwise postpone it's satisfaction, it hits me when my back is turned.

This year was unfortunately no different than the past few.
However I decided I'd roll with the punches it threw, rather than let it knock me down again, tossed it the Finger, and kept going into August.

Getting down to Burn this year was a difficult experience. More bad luck, from exploding car to overused and in need of replacing camping equipment, to literally not having time to prepare for the event due to replacement of housemates, tried to deter me and eliminate my Burning Man plans and visiting my very dusty family and home.

Screw that, I was going. I made it work and by god I was glad I did.

People often talk of a crucible and catalyst moments in their lives, and all the Burn Hippies (I love you guys, but lets call a spade a spade, though this doesn't actually apply to ALL of my friends that go there) admire the event for these deep and meaningful conversions and epiphanies of their lives post-burn.
Yeah, no... I usually work for most of it, so I guess I never get that experience.
Instead, working there, which could have happened anywhere, but it just happened to be there, taught me some things about myself.

I'll share them.

I have a bit of a martyr complex. Not in a way that I desire to receive compliments or praise for working so hard, but rather I have a tendency to push myself incredibly hard to 'Get Shit Done' that I sometimes forget that other people are there to help me and get it done as well. And this reflects on them as I don't trust them to do it. I have noticed that I do it at work, Dickens and a few other places. I think this falls into my being a bit of a perfectionist in the things I throw my heart and mind it. I want it to worth my energy, and when I see it not being treated with the same near-fanatical energy I devote to it, with the love I give it, it is frustrating to me.

This leads me into the second point.

If I am passionate about something, I am a very bad instructor and mentor in it.
This weekend at Dickens combined with the Burn experiences actually define that incredibly well.
In about 30 seconds this weekend, I taught a couple to dance the Waltz, the first time they had ever done it, and after I taught them they immediately went to the dance floor for the next Waltz, went to the middle, and proceeded to hold their freaking own. The pride I felt was immense. Yeah, I could teach a dance well. And while I enjoy dancing, it's never been anything more than peripheral to me. I love it when I feel a connection with my partner, but that is more my enjoying the personal connection than the actual dance itself. I have trained myself to be a good dancer so I can enjoy that connection more, but simply because as a good dancer it provides better opportunities since I don't have to struggle or concentrate on the dance. So I can teach dancing.
Explaining what I do at Burn and teaching people how to devote themselves to a job, even a volunteer one, that I have done passionately and with a fervor bordering on fanaticism for years, that I love doing dearly... That I cannot teach. I can teach the basic job easy enough probably, but trying to show someone how to approach a standard achieved by near total devotion to the job is hard, and unfortunately shows and acts as a detriment when mentoring.

I'm thankful for the people who know this, understand, and told me so that I could better work on moderation and teaching.

I walked out of Burn realizing that my passive nature was causing a lot of Drama unintentionally. My desire to avoid confrontation actually caused more. Between rumor mongering around me that I refused to slap down, to actual drama that I'd back down from. It was creating more stress than I needed. And I needed to stand up against it. I got aggressive. I've probably offended a few people too, but really if they got offended by my deciding that I needed less drama in my life, and by discovering they couldn't roll drama over me anymore, then they sort of had it coming and I'm overall better off. Here's how:

James Recipe for avoiding Drama:
1 Cup of STFU: Don't start it. Nobody cares about who and who with what on who's backyard and who was invited. You really don't need to know, and nobody else except the specific parties involved needs to either.

1/2 Cup of Talk to the Hand: The easiest way to stop drama, at least for yourself, and if everyone does it, is if someone starts, plug your ears and "lalalalalalalalala I'm not listening Lalalalalla' or flat out say, "I DON'T CARE" to anyone attempting to tell you said rumors or gossip. Schadenfreude be damned, you really don't need to know who is hooking up with whom and you are better off not until it becomes obvious (If they are snogging in public, that's fairly damn obvious, you can talk about it then, because it's no longer gossip), or who broke up with who and who's available and omg why this person did show up that day. Get over yourselves, nobody cares how much you know about other people's lives. You're acting like you're still 7 years old playing playground politics to get people to like you by knowing everything about everyone.

2 Cups of Privacy: Facebook is great, stay connected with friends, keep up with their lives, see fun photos of their vacation in ... Holy god my eyes! Gah, no I never wanted to see a picture of you naked Jello Wrestling on Marti Gras... Some things should be kept private. Don't feed the gossip machine, control what you don't want the world to talk about by not airing the laundry to the damn world.

1 Cup of Dealing With It: Man the hell up and grow a pair. If you have a problem with someone, confront it and talk about it. If you have problems with them that you think might end up harming you and really for girls, we understand that you see the world differently since even some of the weaker guys can be stronger physically, then call in an authority figure. Don't send friends around to deal with it, don't be passive aggressive and let it fester. Lance the damn abscess and let the nasty ooze out and away. Deal with your own problems. You aren't children anymore, nobody is to blame for your problems except your own actions, so you might as well deal with them yourself.

Following this recipe, I've cut 90% of the drama from my life. Some is unavoidable, but I'm not trying to avoid it anymore, I'm instead confronting it when I run into it. And by damned, it goes away a hell of a lot faster.

Since August, as I am not progressing on to my original reason instead of a rant, a few more things have happened.

I've started to enjoy my life a lot more. Between finding a new job, losing a lot of the weight gained through the various injuries and illness, going out more often, but not falling into the same patterns. Doing things I love and cutting out things I only do because of following a usual pattern. Encouraging myself towards a future. And establishing friendships on the foundations already in place.

Yeah, it's been a busy three months. And this last one is likely to be busier.
I'm now at Dickens, and between the job and the weekends, I'm dead on my feet some days. And I freaking love it. Because I'm appreciated for what I do, but I am learning to balance it, take care of myself better and moderate.

In short, I decided to grow up. I care about what matters, I cut out what doesn't rather than allowing it to sit and puss up.

I'm thankful I learned to be a better person this year, and I'm thankful to those who helped me.

I'm not even going to start naming names, because I'd probably cap this blog character count out.

But... *WARNING* SAPPY AHEAD
Ahem... Now that that interruption is over...
My friends are my pillars, while I've been learning to stand on my own, and create the solid foundation to stand on, they have been there for me. They have dealt with my whining and complaints, exultations of triumph and crushing defeats. And they, you, are always there to prob me back up on my feet, dust my shoulders off, and push me back in screaming 'Fight, FIGHT, FIGHT!' like a high school schoolyard brawl, just with less slapping like a pansy ass and more actual brawl.

I'd still be here without you, but I wouldn't be the person I am. This year may or may not have been this good without your support and you have more thanks than I can ever express in words.
I keep trying to find the right ones, I spend a little time each day scouring books, blogs, quotes and dictionaries to find out how to say thank you to all of you.

I haven't found anything perfect, and I doubt I will except for the unspoken words I give you when I hug you as thank you for being my friend, but here's something to go by for now.

The most I can do for my friend is simply to be his friend. I have no wealth to bestow on him. If he knows that I am happy in loving him, he will want no other reward. Is not friendship divine in this?
- Henry David Thoreau

To all of you I am thankful. And 2010, if it was good or bad, let us together as friends finish off this December in a style they will remember and sing songs of for ages to come. And then kick off 2011 on notes that will shatter steel around the world.

-James

Don't Take My Med-kit Man!

So I just finished up the Campaign of Warhammer Dawn of War II on the PC.

Yes, I know it came out a while ago and the expansion is due out this month, but there is a reason it took me so damn long.

I didn't want to play it alone.

Don't get me wrong, I love single player games, but not when they have the option open for Co-Op on the campaign missions.

I feel the nature of gaming needs to evolve, more of what we consider to be story based games need to have the option to play with multiple characters, and I have to say THQ did it pretty damn well with their DOW II campaign. They let you play the Force Commander. And whichever of the co-op players hosts the game gets to play at the primary player in this game, but it doesn't deter in the slightest. I have to say their design actually makes the game more enjoyable by cutting down on the amount of micromanagement of 4 squads (in co-op you only need to manage two squads each) that is needed to progress through the gameplay.

One of the things I noted was how easy the game seemed, until I set the difficulty on Insane.

Yeah, it really met up with the label.

It took skill, real teamwork and communication to get through it.

And it was more damn fun than I've had in ages.

Gaming today seems to have only rare instances of multi player story modes or cooperative play, and this is, I think, one of the greater faults in it. Multiple play-through capability is one of the better innovations, similar to the Knights of the Old Republic, Fable and Mass Effect RPG standards of allowing the player to choose different reactions. But the problem is you are still facing a content designed for a single player to guide the storyline.

Imagine those games if you had party members that up and decided, No, they didn't like the fact that you were turning evil, and because it was your buddy playing the character, you can't just kill it off, but actually have to adapt to one player playing goody two shoes, and the other play evil demon spawn. How will the end result of the game turn out. You open the possibility for development to more than just good, evil and neutral endings at that point. It has the potential then to become something so much more than it was, 15, 20, 50 or more possibilities. And yeah, they don't have to be that divergent so as to take away from the development time or budget, but you've just opened up 15 new playable paths and extended the life of your game by at least a few more days. More if it's a game as long as Mass Effect.

And that's just talking RPG style games. One of the most bitched about 'features' of first person shooter games is how dumb your squad mate's AI is. Yeah, you know exactly what I'm talking about. They run into walls, they shoot at the sky or the ground or at a wall because there is an enemy hiding behind it. Why not allow your 3 best buddies to take control of those AI instead, and actually allow real communication squad combat?

Then up the difficulty. Because more players means you don't have to play candy ass, feed me through a tube difficulties, it makes the time players spend playing your game a lot longer, and you now have 4 purchases of the title rather than one because they can play it together, and not in a "can we all happen to get on the same team so we don't have to fight each other" sort of way.

This actually leads into another concept, but I'll leave it for another day.

Game Industry, listen up, cooperative play is nothing but good for your game and replay value and bringing gamers together and creating a social establishment of gamers playing together. How is this a bad thing? Social gaming isn't just the future, it's now. Get on the ball.

Ciao.